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Oct. 14th, 2007 06:39 am
minniemax: (Default)
[personal profile] minniemax
Love, Lust and Marriage

Love- When your eyes meet across a crowded room.
Lust- When your tongues meet across a crowded room.
Marriage- When you try to lose your spouse in a crowded room.
 
Love- When intercourse is called making love.
Lust- When intercourse in called screwing.
Marriage- When intercourse is a little town in Pennsylvania.
 
Love- When you argue over how many kids to have.
Lust- When you argue over who gets the wet spot.
Marriage- When you argue over whose idea it was to have kids.
 
Love- When you share everything you own.
Lust- When you steal everything they own.
Marriage- When the bank owns everything.
 
Love- When it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
Lust- When the relationship is over if you don't climax.
Marriage- When.... uh.... what's a climax.
 
Love- When your heart flutters every time you see them.
Lust- When your groin twitches every time you see them.
Marriage- When your wallet empties every time you see them.
 
Love- When all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel.
Lust- When all the songs on the radio determine how you do it.
Marriage- When you listen to talk radio.
 
Love- When breaking up is something you try not to think about.
Lust- When staying together is something you try not to think about.
Marriage- When just getting through the day is your only thought.
 
Love- When you're only interested in doing things with your partner.
Lust- When you're only interested in doing things TO your partner.
Marriage- When you're only interested in your golf score.
 
Love- When a rainy day means more time to stay inside and talk.
Lust- When a rainy day means more time to stay inside and have sex.
Marriage- When a rainy day means it's time to clean the basement.
 
Love- You only leave the house for coffee and doughnuts.
Lust- You only leave the house for condoms and Vaseline.
Marriage- You only leave the house when you're allowed
 

Discovered

Man discovered weapons and invented hunting;
woman discovered hunting and invented furs.
 
Man discovered colors and invented painting;
woman discovered painting and invented make-up.
 
Man discovered speech and invented conversation;
woman discovered conversation and invented gossip.
 
Man discovered agriculture and invented food;
woman discovered food and invented diet.
 
Man discovered friendship and invented love;
woman discovered love and invented marriage.
 
Man discovered woman and invented sex;
 woman discovered sex and invented headaches.
 
Man discovered trade and invented money;
woman discovered money and after that, man was a complete mess!
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